Sunday, January 5, 2014

Resolution, TBA

I felt so unprepared for 2014. Everything has been so chaotic, though not entirely un-enjoyable, since Thanksgiving that the new year just crept up on me...First with finding out that the owners of the house that we currently rent (and love!) want to sell, then getting approved for a loan to buy the house, hoping family will follow through on their offer to help out with the down payment, spending two weeks with the girls in Orange Park and visiting with my Grandma from Maryland (she met Kendall for the first time!), Alex "relapsing" to his poker playing ways and being secretive about it, uncomfortable conversations with my parents about religion and gay rights, Turkey Day drama, heated arguments, hurtful comments, name-calling, Cookie Day, birthdays, short visits, major car trouble, stressful Christmas shopping ($$$), obligatory travels, a much-needed Movie Date with my sister-in-law, more hurtful comments, tears, heartbreak, therapy... Then Kendall winds up with an awful stomach virus on New Year's Eve that lands us in the emergency room with her hooked up to an IV as the ball drops. Since then, Alex and I have been cleaning up puke for days as the mountain of reeking laundry makes its way into the house from the garage and this thing continues to make its way around the family. All week I feel like I've been floating in the twilight zone.

Ugh, my heart. :-(

Thankfully, my Little Monkey is doing much better and other than nursing sensitive tummies, we're all finally on the mend. For now, I think that's the only ambiguity that I'm going to clarify... I'm tired. Drained. It's nearing 3:30 AM and if I hadn't had that Frappuccino for dinner instead of the leftovers that I heated up for everybody else, I probably would've been passed out in bed hours ago. I'll pay for it tomorrow, for sure, but I'm enjoying the peace and quiet right now while I gather my thoughts, easing back into reality.

So, what is my New Year's resolution? Well... I have a general idea? I want to be happier, healthier; all I can think is, "Me! Me! Me!" but that sounds a little selfish... I can be more patient with the kids and less nit-picky with my husband, sure, but all of that will follow suit once I take better care of myself, right?

"Happiness, Health, Myself."

...It does have a nice ring to it.

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